Wednesday, September 8, 2010

My Daddy

This Friday marks the 5th year of my father's passing. I still find it hard to believe that he is gone. Sometimes, I absently call the house and my mom answers and I realize he is not there. Can't tell her why I called because she misses him, too.

I think of all the things I miss but once I start counting, I lose track. I just miss my daddy. I think like all girls who are close to their dad, we are always the little girl but in my case, I was a tomboy so he kind of had a son, too. Hell, I was into sports more than he was and he thought that was great because I could tell him stuff!

He loved his TV. He loved his golf. He loved to bowl and play poker. He loved meat and potatoes but loved sushi. He was a homebody but from time to time, he liked going out and being social with family or freinds. He loved his family and did all he could to provide for us.

Mind you, my dad didn't have it easy growing up. He was the youngest of 7 kids; 4 girls and 3 boys. My grandfather worked at the big steel mill in Pittsburgh, PA but he was a lost soul. His life consisted of working and drinking and on a good day, the boys didn't get beat up as much. But on a bad day, you better get ready for a whooping. No reason, just because.

My dad knew he wanted out of that life and soon. The day he turned 18, he was gone. He had enlisted into the Navy and was shipped to boot camp. Life changed for him and for the better. His first tour of duty after camp was in Guam... paradise! Then he headed to Japan, where he met my mom. He fell head over heels in love and that was it for him. He found the one woman he always knew he would and he would live the rest of his life loving and he did, let me tell you. If any one woman can say her husband worshipped her, my mom can.

Life wasn't always easy but he made sure that my mom and us girls never went without. He did spoil us and in hind sight, we were lucky to have such a wonderful man as a father and friend.

I wasn't always close to my dad but the last 15 years with his cancer, arthritis and heart problem, being divorced with a daughter who was in her teens, I was able to help my parents out. My mom was his caregiver during those times of illness but I knew she needed a break so I would go over, have her relax with him and watch TV while I cooked and cleaned.

I remember phone calls where he and I would be watching poker on TV and he would count cards. He loved that game and we would be on the phone for hours talking.

He was a smart guy and had a great memory. He taught me a lot but I didn't always follow his advice. My dad was as straight as they come. Jesus and he were probably split as brothers in another era in life, my dad was so honest and unmovable about it. He was so honest that at times, it cost him raises at work because he wouldn't do things "under the table" or whatever his boss at that time wanted him to so to get back at him, they wouldn't give him a raise or a bonus. He was in the military so he had to make do. He didn't care. How he saw himself was more important and if he needed more money, he would just get a second or a third job, which he did a lot of times until he discovered the stock market. Then he was golden because he had a knack for it. Trust me... my mom is doing well for herself because he left more than enough to live on. Got to respect that.

So in his honor and in his memory, as he used to say and yes, I will translate... Anata no gofuki o inotte, kampai! (ah na ta no go foo key o ee no teh kam pa ee)  To your health, wealth and happiness, cheers!

I miss and love you very much, daddy.

Last picture taken of dad...
with mom on their 45th anniversary;
one month and one day before he died.

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