Zen

"Zen is not about self improvement. We don’t strive to become something, or to overcome our deficiencies. We practice to allow the natural, authentic unfolding of buddha-nature to manifest. Our effort is about clearing away delusion and ignorance. In this way, healing and world peace are not an impossible distant dream, but exist right now, right here in this very moment." ~Zen Master Bon Soeng; Empty Gate Zen Center in Berkeley, CA

Turning 50

Many things have happened in my life and many people have passed through. Some have come and gone, never to return while others came back allowing us to have a better relationship. Those who have gone, may your lives be enriched with the love you seek and find. I whole heartily appreciate the time I had with each of you and cherish the memories we created.

I always say that life is short because I sat and watch my father take his last breath, as my daughter held his hand. He was only 69. With my background as an EMT and as a courtesy to a colleague, the nurse, Michael (trust me the irony of his name is not lost on me), asked me to call his time of death. I promise you, it is not a pleasant thing to do. For me to decide my father was dead. I made his time on this earth final and even now, it breaks my heart to pieces to know I did that.

Through his death, he taught me and my family the value of living fully, wholly and loving unconditionally. Getting out and seeing the world. We only have this one life to live; it is not a dress rehearsal, it's the real thing. It may have taken some time to get over the grief of losing him but we are now all following his advice and living as best as we can without regrets and seeing the things we only talked about.

There are so many things to do and see; so many amazing people to meet and places to discover. I can't dwell on the past but need to look forward to a spectacular future. I am here to continue to make wonderful memories with those around me, to take with me into my elder years when I can no longer travel and be out in the world but have the grand stories to tell.

Yes, there are those of you that came in my life with mean intentions because of the kind of people you are; insecure, broken and soulless. My secret is not to allow you to have power and let you go. I forgive but I don't forget. Karma protects me because I respect it. Others are starting to see that is does work and find out the hard way that it hurts when you get stung by it. It comes when you least expect it or need it.

My birthday wish to everyone is to let go of past hurts but keep the good memories inside as it keeps your heart light. Be kind to everyone because you never know when you will need that reciprocated in the future. If love dies for you, don't cause other people's love to die as well. In the end, you only hurt yourself.

Open yourself up to being vulnerable. That is the only way that true love can come in.

Don't use people. Don't hurt them. Don't lie to them. Don't steal from them. When you are wrong or have wronged someone, apologize to them, face to face. It's the honorable thing to do. Give to them what you would want in return because if you live that way, it will come to you.

The important things in life is not money, greed, fame or power. It is love, kindness, compassion, honor and honesty. Decide which is more important to you and live that way all the time. Love and light.

Thought of the Day

The purpose of the mind is to think. The purpose of the heart is to feel. The purpose of the body is for action. The purpose of the soul is to let you know that your thoughts, feelings and actions are limitless and can take you anywhere you choose to go. ~AMK

In Memory

Hard to believe it has been two years that he passed but his music lives on... a song with my name in it is always a good one. LOL

What Memories!

Going through my external hard drive and found this... how hilarious is this freaking picture!

It caused so much ruckus and it was taken purely by chance... funny how The Universe talks to you even when you are not listening. After that, things change for the better for me but worse for others. A dream died for her and she lost her chance at life long happiness with him... a photo became her Karma and it took him away.

Watch what you do... eventually, it all returns to you and if it's bad, you better have good armor because it could kill you.

A Good Thought

Whether it is family, friendship or an intimate relationship, I think this applies to them all.

"Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination." ~ Dr. Maya Angelou

To those who don't fear it, put expectations on it, who share it and embrace what ever comes from it. May your love arrive unscathed to its destinations!

Good Thought of the Day

The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live. ~ Flora Whittemore

Powerful Thought for the Day

To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.

Great Music, Funny Lyrics

One thing about my brother-in-law is that as much as he is a professional, working as a drum tech and back up drummer for a well known artist, he is also in a couple bands as the drummer when he is not on the road. They write some hilarious stuff because it's all about fun and being funny; not taking themselves seriously because life is serious enough. The lyrics may be funny but the music is awesome. I think you will love them.

Check their music out on Reverbnation:

http://www.reverbnation.com/jerryriggtheelchupos

And follow them on Facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jerry-Rigg-the-El-Chupos/136127592626

Another Project Done

Another project is all done. Time to start another.

Feel free to follow me on Facebook at facebook.com/ladybugartisan

Happy Father's Day

Fathers come in all shapes, sizes and personalities. Some are kind and gentle while others can be mean and rough. We learn life through our interactions with them as they have learned from their fathers.

They mold us to who we become, whether we are like them or learn to be opposite of them. We may love or hate them but they are the person that helped to bring us into this world. Even if you don't get along with them, perhaps just being grateful for their part can ease that pain.

I was fortunate to have a father that loved me and my sisters with all his heart. He and his siblings had a rough start to life with a father that was not so kind or loving. They knew of his temper and made every attempt to stay out of his way when he was in a foul mood, to avoid yet another bruise or bump. My father left home as soon as he could but he knew in his heart that when he had kids, he would never be the kind of father that he grew up with and until the day he died, he never was.

He sacrificed a lot to give to us because he believed that his kids and wife came first. A true father just does what he has to do to be there for his kids. The true definition of fatherhood is about giving, sacrifice, unconditional love; whether they are biological or not, those who truly care do these things for their kids.

I once knew someone who was that kind of man. He had a dream of what he wanted to do with his life and was ready grab it. But when the time came, he put his luggage down and sacrificed that dream to take in his two nephews when they needed someone the most. He gave them shelter, the necessities, discipline and more importantly, love. He may have not had kids of his own but he is a father to those boys, who have become the men they are now because of him.

Another friend married his long time girlfriend who had three kids. He loved them as if they were his own and treated that way, so when they got married, it was a natural transition for the kids to start calling him dad since they already thought of him that way.

For me personally, I was fortunate to have had an amazing dad and I know that even though he is not here, he still watches over us, making sure that my sisters and I always stay safe. Rest in peace, daddy and know that we miss and love you very much.

How lucky are we to know that men like that exist, who truly care and are so giving of themselves? That show their love, compassion and kindness while being the strong men they are. They are true super heroes in these days when we lack them.

To all you dads out there; may your day be filled with joy, laughter and love. May your family celebrate the wonderfulness that is you and honor what you have done to always be there for them. The happiest Father's Day is wished to each and every one of you.

TGIF

Happy Friday, albeit a bit wet and thundery, here in New England. Stay dry, grab that delicious cup of coffee and enjoy the morning.

WOW!

There are no words but to say WOW!

Thought of the Day

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. - E. E. Cummings

Rain/Sun

I took this on Friday, June 10th, outside my kitchen window. Momma Nature was not sure if she wanted to keep give me rain or the sun so she gave me a little of both, for a short time... it was a very unique view and glad I was able to catch it in a photo.

Thought of the Day

We spend our days waiting for the ideal path to appear but we forget that paths are made by walking, not by waiting. Take that first step and blaze your own path to your dreams, to that wonderful place or towards that special person. It's all there for the taking.

Thought of the Day

Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened. ~Dr. Seuss

Humor for the Day

Great Show

Sitting by the window, enjoying Momma Nature's show.

Happy Birthday

Happy birthday to all my Gemini friends, since you make up almost 3/4 of my friends. Wishing you all a wonderful year filled with love, laughter and adventures!

Poetry

Words have always intrigued me. How the combination of them could illicit a tear or how it could make you laugh out of control. When I read my first book, I was hooked and my teacher encouraged me to continue to read.

When I was in middle school, I read the poetry of Robert Frost and that changed my life. Poetry was fast and to the point. I didn't have to go through a whole book to convey a message. A few lines written with the right words would make the mind think and process. So with my notebook and pencil in hand, the 10 year old me sat in our backyard with our Koi pond and composed the first poem.

Flash to today... moving cross country the way I did, I brought everything I had so I had been going through boxes until today. It was a pain to do but also fun as I found a lot of old treasures including notebooks full of old poems that I had not transposed onto my flash drive or backed up on the external hard drive.

It was interesting to read my old stuff and see where I was mentally back then. One in particular, written July 28, 2002, grabbed my attention. Kind of a Jekyll and Hyde type of person but it was written about a guy that I actually knew who had this really dark side that only close friends saw but was well loved for the mask he wore that was friendly and kind. He hated that mask but it was what he had to wear to live in this society with his status and family's money.This came out of me one night as I watched him sit by a fire starting out the window and his eyes were what caught my attention so I wrote what I saw and knew. The irony is that he is a Gemini, who are known to have that duality about them.

Duality

AMK © 2010

He sits, starting into the emptiness

His thoughts chaotic and twisted

On the exterior, a fine gentleman of country and breed

On the inside, a raging made man exists

One, society adores and the other society abhors

The feeling of conflict rages within

He sits, staring into the emptiness

Mayonnaise Jar & Two Beers

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the two beers.

A professor stood before his Philosophy 201 class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full.

The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things; your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions; if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else; the small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or golf balls.The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents.Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Practice "romance" as often as possible. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of "Mama" first; the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked. The beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers with a friend.'

As my sister said, it is the Buddhist way of life minus the beer. ;)